With the establishment of national kennel clubs, conformation dog shows, and pedigrees that only register “purebred” dogs, the majority of these breeds have only been developed in the last 165 years. Today’s dog comes in a seemingly infinite range of sizes, shapes, coats, and colors. This diversity is the product of selective breeding that, in turn, is primarily in the hands of breeders and judges. Perhaps nowhere is the diversity of the dog more evident than in the skull, which, in contrast to wild canids, is too often misshapen and deformed. With selective breeding to arbitrary standards of canine beauty comes myriad health concerns, including shortened life expectancy in many cases. We have literally shaped—and continue to alter—the domestic dog, but we must ultimately ask two questions: for what purpose and at what cost to our “best friend”?